I’ve been busy.
But really I’ve been on a polarized roller coaster of emotions. Due to my east vs. west emotions I haven’t had the motivation to write.
My last #NoMoreStudentLoan update was April 16, when I busted my budget.
My motivation stalled because I wasn’t feeling jolly about having to pick up my kiddos from school early for 6 weeks in a row because of some injury or illness.
Nor was I particularly amused about driving around town to find an open pharmacy at 3AM following an emergency room visit.
I also wasn’t particularly excited about paying my ridiculously high MUD bill nor was I excited about the three collection accounts that showed up on my credit report from closed credit cards that total $3,170.00 (neither of which were there when I challenged myself in Feb. to pay off my debt, yes there valid, I checked).
And finally, getting caught up in the awesomeness that is a healthy romantic relationship sort of just left me spent.
All I had the energy to do was lift my fingers to press 5.50 on my phone keyboard to pay my minimum daily Mr. Miyagi payment.
This payment has kept me on track so to speak but hasn’t really put much of a dent in my debt.
All of these factors combined left me without a desire to write.
But then a wonderful woman I’ll call her CeCe walked into my side hustle and sat down for dinner.
When I walked up to her table to greet her and her family,
She said. “Excuse me, are you Stacey Flowers!?!?”
I said “Yes, I am”
She said “Oh my goodness, I follow your blog, you said you’re a server, I’m a server too!!!! This is my husband, and my mom!!!!” “Mom! “This is the woman I was telling you about, she radiates happiness, remember I sent you her video on Mother’s Day!!!!!”
By the end of dinner she had her husband snapping a picture of us and before the night ended this picture was posted on her Instagram page @hotmesslioness.
The whole experience of being recognized as Stacey Flowers is very surreal but it’s occurring more frequently.
Here’s what I connected with that helped motivate me to write again:
I am here to serve.
My daily prayer is always how may I serve?
I realized I am here to serve happiness.
I realized I can do this in the form of a #NoMoreStudentLoanDebt blog post.
Cece sharing that she reads, shares, and likes my blog enough to call me by name in an environment which has nothing to do with how to find happiness or repay your student loans motivated to write.
: Despite my absence.
: Despite my new debts.
: Despite my lack of motivation.
Sometimes I forget to share that true happiness doesn’t mean unicorns and smiley faces. Authentic happiness means feeling your real feelings when you’re really having them.
Thank you CeCe for answering my prayer.