Your Dreams Won’t Scare You

People keep saying your dreams should scare you. I disagree because that is the definition of a nightmare. Your dreams will inspire you. Many of us are presently living a nightmare and calling it a dream.

Let’s redefine “your dreams” shall we? Because “your dreams” are different than… my dreams, your husband’s dreams, and your pastor’s dreams for you.”Your dreams” are yours meaning they are uniquely crafted and cemented by the desires of your heart. If you’re living a nightmare it is only because you are living someone else’s dream for your life.

Stop it. This is your life.

One of my closest friends works in corporate America. She loves pretty much everything about corporate America. The prestige, vacation time, office space, work teams, security and so much more. I am an Entrepreneur and I love everything about building a business. The clients, risks, rewards, independence, freedom and so much more.

At several points in our careers, we’ve attempted to convince one another to switch dreams. This never worked because she never found comfort in the uncertainty and hustle of entrepreneurship and I never found peace with the predictability and routine of the corporate ladder. About four years ago we stopped trying to recruit one another to the other side of the tracks.

We’ve accepted that our unique gifting is planted firmly in the right environment. Should either of us give up on our dreams to satisfy the fears of the other we’d instantly begin to live a nightmare? If at present your dreams are scaring the living day lights out of you. I want you to STOP and realize those are not your dreams.

Think about it…

  • Beyonce wasn’t scared to go on a world tour (#MrsCarterTour) without releasing a new album. No this idea inspired her to do that and then go on another world tour with her husband the following year.
  • Sherly Sandberg wasn’t scared to Lean In and rise to the auspicious role of COO of Facebook. No she curated her career for her current position.
  • MyLeik Teele wasn’t scared to become the center of brown beauty conversations. She launched CurlBox before she even had a product.
    Listen to me… your dreams don’t scare you, “your dreams” inspire you.

Here’s how you wake up from living a nightmare. (Also known as living someone else’s dream).

1. You kick self-doubt, out!

This means you shut down all negative chatter in your life. Anything which causes you to doubt yourself, get rid of it.

Ex. Arguing with people about my life or my business causes me to have self-doubt. So I decided to STOP arguing with people. To maintain my pledge I have a list of 25 things I could be doing instead of arguing. Should an argument feel like it’s about to start, I simple refer to my list and get to work.

2. Write “your” dreams down.

Life is going to throw an elephant at your face and then say make lemonade out of lemons. What this means is life naturally has ups and downs. As humans we tend to flow with the cycle of life instead of observing the cycle and using it to our advantage.

When life throws an elephant at your face you need to know which direction to move. Left? Right? If you write your dream down, you can refer to it in times of happiness and stress. When times are good you’ll say: “Hey we’re headed in the right direction.” When times suck (and they will occasionally) you’ll say: “Hey, this is where we are going, don’t give up.”

People keep saying “your dreams” should scare you. A scary dream is a nightmare. Your dreams will always (yes always) inspire you.

Now, I’d love to hear from you. Please leave a comment telling me about your dreams.



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